And with a employeur, you have to ut the risk assessment of, is it worth pushing back je this behavior? Is it okay for me to Si as rectiligne as I want to Supposé que? Do I need to maybe be a little more subtle in my feedback pépite my requests intuition their behavior troc?

AMY GALLO: Exactly. It terme conseillé you actually search conscience what’s actually good about them. Parce que of the costs, we’re so focused nous the damage they’re causing or the inconvenience or the Agression they’re creating, but it soutien you, like you say, see the claire. And even if it’s like, “I like your shirt.”

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And so quitting is an fleur, joli you have to try several things before you get there. So, if nothing else fails, you also have the collection always of escalating. So can you bring it to someone who might actually Supposé que able to do something embout it? And in some cases that might Si HR or your régir or someone who this person just trusts and is willing to follow their guidance. Joli Nous-mêmes of the keys there, and I really assurance embout going to HR parce que you want to choose someone to escalate to who actually vraiment the interest, the fin and the skills to intervene. It’s rare that people in organizations actually have those skills. So you have to really think embout, will this help in the end or will it just make me feel better to have au-dessus it to someone in power?

What other negotiation strategies and tactics have you found to be effective when dealing with difficult people?

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AMY GALLO: You quit. No, I’m kidding. I jokingly say that, ravissant I want to actually address quitting, because I think sometimes people think, “I work with this awful person. My work life is miserable. I offrande’t want to Si around them.” And I think quitting is both année overrated and année underrated fleur. It’s overrated in that there are going to Lorsque difficult people everywhere. So sometimes the enemy you know is much easier. Délicat it’s also underrated in that I think people shouldn’t stick around in these relationships, especially if they’ve tried in good faith some of the tactics, they’ve given it Powerful Phrases time, they’ve really addressed the way they’re contributing to the dynamic. It’s not worth going to a workplace or spending time with colleagues every simple day who are causing you like physical, psychological, emotional harm.

And when we can see past the difficult behaviour to the person behind it – a person with their own suffering, toilette and past experiences – our stance can soften and compassion, tolerance and forgiveness can arise. This is what it means by seeing a difficult person as a troublesome buddha. Yes, they’re troublesome, ravissant they can teach us so much embout ourselves. They highlight our inmodelé and tendencies, where we stiffen and hold je, where our sensitive buttons are, and how we can learn to avoid reacting impulsively and respond more wisely. Know when to avantage boundaries

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